Cancelling a News Subscription

Alright, brace yourself for the Herculean shitshow that is cancelling an online news website subscription. First, you’ll have to navigate through the labyrinthine hellscape of their website, designed by sadistic fucks who want to make sure you never find the cancellation option. After clicking through a million irrelevant tabs and links, you might stumble upon the cancellation button, which is hidden better than a damn Easter egg. But wait, the nightmare doesn’t end there! You’ll be greeted by a barrage of guilt-tripping messages and confirmation pop-ups, trying to emotionally manipulate you into staying. If you’re lucky enough to pass that psychological warfare, you might then be forced to call a customer service number, where you'll be put on hold for an eternity, listening to the same shitty hold music on loop. When you finally get a human on the line, they’ll probably give you a condescending lecture about all the “exclusive” content you’re about to lose, as if you give a single fuck. And after all that, they might still not process the cancellation properly, leaving you with a renewed subscription and an aneurysm-inducing rage. Fucking nightmare.