Bluesky Naming Problems

What is a skeet?

Some people insist on calling a "post" on Bluesky a "skeet". But they shouldn't...

Scene: Dinner table, evening. The family is just sitting down for dinner. The mother, Janice, a middle-aged woman who has recently become obsessed with Bluesky, is busy on her phone while her two teenage kids, Emily (15) and Josh (17), look on in horror. Their father, Rick, is reading a newspaper and ignoring everything.

Janice: Oh, you guys won’t believe this. I just got done skeeting the funniest thing ever.

Josh: [Drops his fork, eyes wide] MUM! STOP SAYING THAT. Please, I beg you.

Emily: [Facepalms] Jesus, Mum, you can’t keep using that word in public or at home. It sounds… like, it sounds SO bad.

Janice: What the hell are you two whining about now? [Gives them a look] I said I skeeted. You know, on Bluesky. It’s like tweeting but—BETTER. It's called skeeting. Perfectly normal.

Josh: [Mortified] No, Mum, it really isn't! When you say you 'skeeted,' it sounds like… oh God, I can’t even explain it. It sounds filthy!

Emily: [Turns red] Mum, seriously! It sounds like you’re talking about… bodily fluids. It’s awful. Think about what you’re saying!

Janice: [Waves her hand dismissively] Oh, cut the shit. If you two are going to let a little slang word get you in a tizzy, that’s YOUR problem, not mine. I skeet when I have something to say! What’s so wrong with that?

Rick: [Finally puts down the newspaper] Wait… what in the hell is skeeting? Why does it sound like a sex act? Janice, have you started some weird adult TikTok trend I should know about?

Janice: [Rolls her eyes] Oh for fuck’s sake, Rick! You too?! It’s just Bluesky. You SKEET. It’s the same as tweeting! It's hip! It’s new!

Emily: [Glares] It’s new, alright. And it’s a new way to scar your teenage children for life. Please, for the love of all things holy, just say "post" or "share." Literally anything else!

Janice: NO. I’m not changing shit. Everyone on Bluesky calls it a skeet. And I’m not gonna let some hormonal, perverted brats convince me otherwise.

Josh: You know what? Fine. [Stands up, voice shaking] But when you’re shouting to Grandma next week, "Look, I just skeeted a cute cat photo!"—don’t come crying to us when she thinks you've lost your damn mind!

Janice: [Pauses, visibly confused] Grandma wouldn’t care! She’s old. She barely knows what an app is. [Goes back to her phone] Now, where was I… oh yeah, I just got five likes on my skeet about the neighbor’s dog shitting on our lawn.

Rick: [Under his breath] Jesus Christ, this family is doomed.

There you go. A perfectly uncomfortable family moment, with Mum resolutely sticking to her cringe-worthy ways.

Other Conversational Dialogues